Feel free to skip this one...

'Cause it's all about ME ME MEEEEHHHHH!!!

Brian Regan for the WIN

I need to explain a few things. In case you have not caught on by now, I am what some people may affectionately call: a nerd.

I like Pokemon (from the first 150 to the Legendary Dog Pokemon [Raikou, Suicune and Entie], and a few others like Latios and Latias; but anything from Vanillite onward gets weird).

See, this ^ is ok...

...but this ^ no, no it's not

I like Anime (FMABrotherhood, Clannad, Clannad After story, Noragami, My Love Story!!, PsycoPass, Samurai Champloo, Ouran High School Host Club, Angel Beats, Beyond the Boundary, Princess Tutu, The Guardian of the Sacred Spirit, Nana, Kobato, Hyouka, Pandora Hearts, Gargantia on the verdurous planet, Stiens;Gate, Munto, Hotarubi no moro e, Ano Hana, Legend of the Legendary Heroes, Silver Spoon.... JUST to name a FEW)

Hyouka - So much anime, so little time

-PS. I realize Pokemon is an anime series, HOWEVER, I grew up watching it before realizing what anime was, so it still gets its own category. - 

I like T.V. Series like: Doctor Who (NOT just 2005 onward, I also like the "classic," if you will,  Doctor Who); Sherlock BBC (with Benedict Cumberbatch and Martin Freeman); Brooklyn Nine-Nine; Community; Heroes (at least up to the 2nd season); Lie to Me; Supernatural (also working through that one); Freaks and Geeks; Magic School Bus (nostalgic); Avatar the last Airbender; Merlin  BBC;

Ninth Doctor with a "Rose" crown... get it?

What else... OH YEA, really anything directed by Joss Whedon (Firefly, Serenity, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Angel, DollHouse, Much Ado About Nothing, Avengers).

#lovethisman

ALSO: Studio Ghibli... need I say more?

I mean, you could follow me on pinterest (username: malermal [don't ask]) and see the nerdy/fantastic stuff I post to get a better understanding if you really want.

SO - This explains my use of odd gifs to references you may not understand but still (ideally) relate to.

Other side facts include me being: Vegetarian since 2011 (Not to be confused with vegan - I eat eggs, cheese, butter, milk); I enjoy listening to music like: orchestra, soft rock, night core, J-pop, Indie, Alternative, Electro, remixes, and such; I highly enjoy the Zelda series (games, not cartoon series); and I used to be a moderate attendee of the SCA which I would recommend to ANYONE to check out/join (http://sca.org).

So yeah, I'm a nerd, who's full on Christian, and tends to fangirl when certain topics arise.

Well, that covers it more or less. Maybe this brings some insight or confirms some suspicions for my readers.

~To God be the glory

The Topic of prayer

If you were anything like me a few years ago, praying might have felt like this to you:

'Common' give me what I want - this isn't what I wanted at all!

OH NO  - BACKFIRE - ABORT, ABORT!'

Or maybe sometimes like this:

#bliss #couldbesleeping

Or even this:

*Am I doing this right?
*How does this work?

I have heard many things during youth group, as an attendee and as a leader, that prayer was something along the lines of "talking to God," "asking for help/guidance," more or less talking at God. Whilst attending Briercrest and Hillcrest, the theme of "Hearing from God" has become a huge focus... it's as if we've done enough "talking to God" and are now wanting Him to "speak back to us," and "tell/guide us in what we ought to be doing."

Prayer started making more sense after taking Discipleship and Evangelism class in the Spring of this year. One of the class books we had to read was "Evangelism and the Sovereignty of God" by J.I. Packer (2008); funny enough, prayer was a main theme in this book.

J.I. Packer wrote with great conviction and assurance on the Christian standing of prayer is the belief in God's sovereignty. He says, "if you  are a Christian, you pray; and the recognition go God's sovereignty is the basis of your prayers. In prayer you ask for things and give thanks for things. Why? Because you recognize that God is the author and source of all the good that you have had already, and all the good that you hope for in the future" (pg. 15).

Turns out, we can pray without realizing we are trusting in the sovereignty of God (I am speaking from personal experience), but this also means we are that much more at odds with how God will or will not answer our prayers. We cannot place good enough trust in Him because we fail to grasp the sovereignty and love of God.

Hence the "Reassuring Quote" from Carl Hinderager could come off as harsh or insensitive to some. When you don't realize the sovereignty and love of God, the prayers that seem to go unanswered, or not answered 'right,' could damage the relationship.

HOWEVER, it was this quote from Packer that changed everything for me when it came to prayer, "The prayer for a Christian is not an attempt to force God's hand, but a humble acknowledgment of helplessness and dependence" (pg. 15). 

At this point someone may be thinking, "but what about people who fast, and/or pray day after day, for hours on end for something or someone? Isn't that trying to force God's hand?" 
- Well, it could be if that's what you think it takes for God to hear and answer you, however, if you're a praying person and recognize the sovereignty and love of God then this might answer your question:

"Men of prayer and women of prayer will agonize before God for something that they know is according to his will, because of some definite promise on the page of Scripture… [after some time] the Holy Spirit reveals to them in no uncertain way that God has granted their request. They are then confident that they need no longer send up any more petitions to God about the matter” (The Kneeling Christian, 1945, An Unknown Christian, pg. 44).

So, yes, there may come times one needs to fast and pray, and it's still in those times that one is recognizing their "helplessness and dependence" on God; which therefore and thusly strengthens their relationship with Him. 

Hopefully this helps a little when it comes to prayer. I know it really helped me. 

~To God be the Glory 

Something big

Do you feel it, that slight change in the weather? Did you notice, the sunrise starting later? Can you see, the date on the calendar reads August 27th and that means SUMMER IS ALMOST OVER?!?

Well, that happened, and soon, very soon that also means, school is starting and so does youth group!

I have to say I am VERY exciting for the upcoming year!

The Youth Pastor and I have been organizing the schedule, figuring out talks, planning retreats, etc., and soon it will all be coming together starting September 2nd! 

After having a meeting with the Youth Pastor, I was encouraged to seek out my professors from Briercrest and ask if they'd want to be guest speakers at youth group. Although some said they would be unable to, their words of thanks and encouragement brightened my day... it's funny, even though they are people, and even having gotten to know them... after seeing and hearing how brilliant and popular they are amongst the student body, it sometimes feels like dealing with celebrities that you cannot help but fangirl over when they respond to your messages. 

It's going to be interesting now that I have graduated yet most of my friends who will also be doing youth ministry are still in school. So while they will be saying after a night of youth group, "I gotta go and write a paper" - I'll be saying ," Ha. Haha. Hahaha. AHAHAHAHAHAAAAA, I DON'T... but, I gotta get to work by 6am..." 

OH. Which reminds me - PRAYER - We need prayer!

This was also part of agenda with this blog that I could write things that the Youth Group would need prayer for, and as you dear reader, would take time to pray for these requests. That way I can be kept accountable and we can be encouraged when God answers these requests. 

Here's what we need prayer for:

1. Our youth leaders and Youth Pastor: 

• Most of our leaders are from Briercrest and will be swamped with homework, deadlines, and stress of homework and deadlines, pray that they make the right sacrifices and know when to speed 
• That we as leaders will bond and be the encouragement and example of what loving and faithful Christians look like
• Also for our Youth Pastor, he is one man with many responsibilities, pray that he receives wisdom, courage, and strength (physical and spiritual). 

     2.  Our Youth Group as a whole:

• That the youth would be know how to love one another as Christ loves us
• The youth would see the importance of youth group and continuously come and not once in a while or when convenient 
• That ALL of us would find no satisfaction in anything else but God and we would all hunger for the reading of Scripture 
• That we would keep the main thing the main thing, God as our Father whom we want to learn and love and be making disciples of Christ 

That all I can think of for now, I'm sure there will be more along the way as well as updates in prayer requests and praise items. 

I'm really excited to be updating this blog with weekly notes on how youth group is doing and talk sessions and the like! 

Stay posted and thank you for taking the time to read this!

~To God be the glory 

Gospel breakdown - Hebrew student style

Once upon a time, my bother posted on my Facebook wall saying: Sarah, you're a Hebrew student. You know the law. Why is it that I can eat pork and shrimp and basically break the law and yet when it comes homosexuality and adultery I can’t?


Now, had he asked me this question 4 years ago, I would have been flustered and upset that he would post such a daring question for anyone on Facebook to read. 

At that time I would have either let the question go unanswered, thus looking like a complete idiot or someone who does not always get their notifications; or I'd answer him back through e-mail saying I wouldn't know the answer and possibly do research... HOWEVER, that day, the day he chose to post this question to my fb wall for all to see was the day I was confident enough after spending 4 years at Bible college to actually have a well rounded answer to his question. 

Coming at this question like: LET'S DO THIS!

This also ties in with my other blog - The game changer: Matthew 5:19-20 - and it's a decent break down of the Gospel - at least from a Hebrew student's perspective it does (if you know anything about hebrew, it's that they tend to say a lot of things in order to fully describe what it is they're trying to describe... the Psalms show a thing or two about that). SOME sermons you should check out are of Peter and Steven's breakdown of the Gospel within the first seven chapters of Acts. 

Anyway, this was my response to my brother:

1. God established the OT Law for Israel as a way for them to stand out against the other nations and to live in unity, loyalty, and love to one another and God, thus drawing the other nations in by their practices. 
2. HOWEVER, as seen in Judges, 1&2 Chronicles, 1&2 Kings, the major and minor prophets, the Israelites could NOT MAINTAIN THE OT LAW, OR THEIR LOVE FOR GOD, EVEN AS THEIR LIFE AND WELL BEING DEPENDED ON IT. 
3. God, knowing this was bound to happen, set a plan that after the fall of humanity would come one who would bring unity to God and Humans (Gen 3) 
4. JESUS TAKES STAGE. He being born of a virgin and of the Holy Spirit, he maintained sinless status as he lived life as a hebrew under the Jewish OT Law.
5. When Jesus died, he was the sacrifice lamb God needed in order for humanity to be reconciled and redeemed to Himself. THUS Jesus' righteousness covers us and we are not longer obligated to live by the OT law because Jesus fulfilled it for us (Galatians). 
6. YET - We are still to live in light of God's love and Jesus' sacrifice, which is why we are to follow the commands given to us by Christ in the Gospels (see Matthew 5-7), which are part of the New Covenant Christians live under in the NT. 
7. When it comes to homosexuality, Jesus does not talk about it directly as much as Paul and Peter do. But since Paul and Peter are considered to be Christ's apostles, we have to believe and honour the fact Christians cannot engage in Homosexual practice. 
8. THEREFORE AND THUSLY - When it comes to OT Law, Christians are no longer bound to it, and can eat pork and shrimp as a result along with blending fabrics and such. HOWEVER, we cannot engage in adultery and Homosexual practices because of the commands Christ gives to us in the NT, and because of the guidance and counsel of his Apostles.

I hope this helps those who wanted to explain the Gospel but didn't know what it all entailed. 

Of course, this is my version and Paul has a nice short version in 1 Corinthians 15:1-8 (NIV 2011) - Go take a look, while you're at it, read the whole letter, it's a good one.  

~To God be the glory 

Reassuring quote 2

~To God be the glory 

The game changer - Matthew 5:19-20

Allrighty, let's do this. 

If I asked you, "What are the rule/commands Christians are to follow?" would you answer:

A. Exodus 20
B. I dunno...
C. The one Jesus talks about

If you answered A., then my follow up question would be, "Why only those ones?" I mean, after all, sure Jesus mentions some of them in the Gosples, but those are also found in Leviticus and Deuteronomy, so why would we not also be following those ones?

If you answered B., I'll get back to you on that.

If you answered C., see answer A.

So, we've come full circle. The problem here is that this question should be answerable and not difficult to explain. The sad thing is that many people (including myself for the longest time) could not give a straight answer.

Therefore and thusly, having learned some things at school, and can hopefully convey what God has been telling us through the Scriptures, Imma break it down for ya.

In Matthew 5:19-20 we read a line where Jesus says "therefore anyone who sets aside one of the lest of these commands and teaches others accordingly all be called least in the kingdom of heaven..." The two keywords I'm looking at are "therefore" and "these commands" - at first I assumed that the "therefore" was tying the previous versers talking about the Law and the Prophets which then would mean that the "these commands" are about the OT (Old Testament). HOWEVER Carl Hinderager (the man I quoted from in my last blog) stated that the rest of the NT (New Testament) Scripture indicates that Jesus' commands are the ones we are to follow, also, Jesus says himself in Matthew 5:17 that he came to "full fill" the Law and the Prophets, so that means we do not have to follow the OT Laws, rather we are to follow the ones Jesus' commands which are the "these" he's talking about in Sermon on the Mount.

THIS IS THE GOSPEL. This is the reason why Paul is so enamoured with telling people about Christ, and why his disciples struggled with having Gentiles in the NT Church (event though that was also part of God's plan in the OT -  Gen 18:18; Psa. 22:27, 46:10, Isa. 42:6a, 49:6a; ). Christ FULFILS the Law and the Prophets, that means we are no longer UNDER THE LAW as Christians, but we are to FOLLOW AND OBEY the commands of Christ and what his disciples talk about in the NT.

You may be wondering, "Sarah, what does this have to do with youth ministry?" If not, well, that's cool too... but I'm going to explain what this has to do with youth ministry.

After I had come to this understanding as to why we need not follow all of the OT Law, and what commands we as Christians are to be following, I found myself asking the girls in my small group at youth group what the "commands of Jesus" were.
One said Exodus 20. I gave her a strange look and said, "No... Moses gave those commands. What are the ones Jesus gave?" No one could answer me. Most of these girls come from Christian homes, and most went to Christians schools, and went to church and yet NONE could answer me what the commands of Jesus were. I directed them to Matthew 5-7 and told them THESE are the commands Jesus gave, and the rest of the Gospels talk about them.

At first I was concerned that none of these girls knew this... until I remembered that for myself it had taken me 23 YEARS TO FINALLY UNDERSTAND. Somehow, I had gone so many years without fully understanding that when Jesus said, "I have not come to abolish them but to fulfill them" he actually meant it. That being said, this is also why Paul talk about in Romans the holiness of the OT Law but having freedom in Christ. This also answers the question 'why we follow some of the OT Law and not all of it.'

This is part of my mission in youth group, to convey the goodness, mercy, and love of God in the OT and the freedom, glory, righteousness, and love that is found through Christ in the NT.

Please ask me any questions if things didn't make sense, or feel free to add comments to what has been said, and/or write praises to the God our Father who saved us through Jesus Christ our Lord.

~To God be the glory

Reassuring quote

A quote from a Bible respecting man who is much loved by the students at Briercrest. God bless him. This quote is also from a class I took that changed my life, which I will be talking about in my next blog post. 

~To God be the glory 

A female youth pastor

We live in an incredible time. With a few strokes (or swipes) of our fingers on our laptops, ipads, phones, we are able to access information people over 20 years ago never would have thought possible. We are able to receive, give information, know what is happening in the world within seconds, as well as place our thoughts, feelings, and ideas where anyone in the world can read, see, or hear it.

We can read and watch things like: what hormones/chemicals are being put into your food, worse places crime is found in Canada, awareness of females still being paid less then men, or ‘Facts That Prove Pugs Are The Best Dogs Ever’ (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XgRWf1330CM).

These days, women are finding more of a voice in the world and in the church, which is why it is getting to be more acceptable for women to be youth pastors.

Now, don’t get me wrong, I know there is still some hesitancy in Christian circles when it comes to any female having the title “Pastor” alongside their name.

To be honest, I always figured Pastoring was a male role only; which is why I often wondered after working under a female youth pastor during my first year at Briercrest is whether or not the church took the role of youth pastor seriously.

Level with me here in my line of thinking:

1. Do people take youth pastors seriously?
2. If not, can anyone attain that position?
3. If yes, can females, along with males, have the chance to be youth pastors?

Here’s my thought process with these questions: in answer to question 1, if we don’t take the role of youth pastor seriously, it could be because the idea of youth group itself is nothing more than a safe Christian drop in center, aka glorified babysitting. On the other hand, it could be a chaotic Christian outreach program with inflatable sumo suits, dodge-ball, clean raves, and the gospel message snuck in. Even so it could be something the church should do because kids need a program right? ‘Look, we have an evening once a month where we play icebreaker games and read the bible like an awkward young adults group.’

Answer for question 2, since the idea of youth group is a poor one, then anyone could run the youth group. It doesn’t matter if their male, female, a youth, dog, monkey, alien, whatever; as long as they give what the church wants and what appeals to the parents.

HOWEVER, if the answer is ‘yes’ then that means the church is looking for someone who fits their criteria for what they expect for the youth group, and if their going for biblically based, then a male youth leader would be ideal, right?

SO – here I am: introvert, HSP (see my blog ‘Youth ministry and personality’ about these terms), and a female. IF my calling is to be in youth ministry and the chance to be a youth pastor comes up, how is this going to work?

WELL, to be honest, the answer to that question will come with time, but for now, I have a story as to me being in leadership positions and my thoughts on the matter.

It was for a class project (fyi, a LOT of my stories and thoughts will go back to College, if that is bothersome, I am sorry, but you have been warned), and my group had the chance to lead an evangelistic training night and an evangelism night at the youth group we all were attending. PLOT TWIST, I was the only girl in the group project, and the only girl in the Sr. High Youth group we would be doing this project with… and I was overseeing the whole thing.

I made sure the guys in my group knew what roles needed to be fulfilled, which was who would be speaking and giving testimonies; and for the youth nights, I lead some of the activities.

Maybe it was because it was near the end of our second semester and the guys were just not wanting to pull their weight… but none the less as the project wore on I thought it was interesting that in this group of guys, and even at the youth group, no one was making jokes or seriously upset that as a girl I was leading it. Maybe it was because I was more like the traffic director and not one of the main speakers, even so, I get the feeling if I had given a talk or a testimony those nights, it would have been fine.

I have this view that youth pastors are just like head pastors in the church, except their audience is younger and more story visuals and audience participation is needed. However, because of this view, the idea of me being a perspective youth pastor seems so conflicting because female pastors are still not fully accepted and the idea of having THAT much responsibility seems so overwhelming.

In the mean time, I am not a female youth pastor, or any pastor ordained or otherwise, I am still just a volunteer that has the opportunity to be in a few leadership roles this upcoming year. As the year unfolds and more pass by, we shall see where the path of youth ministry takes me.

~To God be the glory

Dark on me - Part 2

To start off: 

Thank you everyone who read my last blog and encouraged me with your kind words and affirmation to what I wrote about. In all honesty, I've only shared with a few people that story and even then I did not tell them about the part with my thoughts about the Devil. I was scared that they would criticize me or think I was insane to think such things. I thought I was afterwords so that's why I didn't say anything about those particular thoughts... but after some of your feed back, I can see now that moments like those shared with others can give hope to those that have been to those dark places are not alone, and God can see them through as well.


Secondly, I wanted to summarize two main points from the previous blog, selfishness and grief.

There's a reason why I could consider that time of asking God or the Devil to take my life an ultimate selfish moment. 
In my torrent of thoughts and feelings, somewhere along the line I acknowledged that my request could be a selfish one... but I also acknowledged that I didn't care. 
I was tired and done with trying to manage my life as a responsible adult and living up the the standards set by myself and the possible expectations of others. 

Now onto grief. It does seem weird that I could consider myself grieving during and after that night for the next month-ish. But I only realized I was grieving after reading this article posted on Facebook: "Learn How to Grieve" and I read this line, "it might be the loss of a job, dream, a relationship, status or innocence, especially the things we put our hope, confidence and value." 

So for the following month-ish, I sought out specific people who I could confide in about my ordeal and my questioning about youth ministry. Some of their responses helped a little, but it wasn't enough to soothe my soul which was still in torment. I even received a letter from my parents with enough money for rent and some to spare while it said "wishing you were here, but glad to know you are where God wants you to be." Tears sprang to my eyes reading this, thankful for their continuing support, but worried as to if I even knew why God wanted me on the prairies... if He wanted me here. 

During mid June, I was housesitting for my friends, and getting some steadier hours at the spa for work. I hadn't read my Bible for a while at this point, and talking to God had been minimal since the dark night. However, it was at this point that God got my attention. 

Picture this. I had netflix playing on tv, while on my computer with fb open, and was downloading a picture from my phone onto it. While scrolling on fb, I found this article: you-cant-serve-God-and-entertainment (seriously, read this article when you get the chance). I was super convicted by it, and even while I was midway through reading it, I looked around at all the entertainment units I had open and wasn't fully paying attention to them... and I said out loud, "I need help." 

The next day, I decided to not watch netflix and instead read through 1 Corinthians... all of it. I decided to read it after reading Francis Chan's the 'Forgotten God' remembering how he often quoted from it. After reading 1 Corinthians  I was amazed by how much wisdom is mentioned in it, which I knew from my Hebrew classes wisdom is associated with God and the Holy Spirit; and I was convicted by how the Holy Spirit gives us gifts for the Church's encouragement. 

I decided that the next Sunday I went to church, I would put myself to the test and know for sure if my gift of being highly sensitive would be glorifying to the church, and if that really was my gift or not. I was so excited that when I went to work and after hours of being there I was not even hungry. I believe that I truly was filled with the Holy Spirit then... and it was amazing. 

So, the following Sunday came... and... nothing happened. I even had to leave early because I was attending a bridal shower. During that time and during work that evening, I concluded that God didn't have to answer my prayer that sunday, He could do it whenever He wanted... little did I know that was sure to happen. 

It was almost the end of my shift at work, that I found out from one of my co-workers at the Spa that he had been tried for something he said he didn't do, and could end up in jail for eight years for it. As I listened to his story of his family life and his semi acceptance of the injustice of his situation... I cried. I told him I would come back after swiping out and when I did, I asked him if I could pray for him. Keep this in mind, he isn't a Christian, but he knows of Christianity and he is familiar with Joe's Place... and he still accepted prayer. I basically asked God for His justice in my co-worker's situation, and for His love to be maid known to him, as well as for complete control over the situation. 

After I prayed for my co-worker and was biking home, I realized God had answered my prayer for my gifts to be used. Sure, it wasn't in the church setting like I thought, but God used my prayer to show that with His gifts given, He could use me anywhere at anytime.

With this fire kindled in my heart and mind, I decided to seek out the Youth Pastor and ask if I could help him in a more major capacity now that I had graduated and could use more of my time to focus on the youth group. He agreed and we have since been planning the program and seeing what roles I could fulfill as well as seeking out others to help with the roles we need for the program. 
I can now look back and give thanks to the dark time I was placed in. If it was not for it, I would not know that I could go so low and yet God would wait patently and lovingly help me out of it and fill me with a new drive for youth ministry... all  the while strengthening my trust in Him. 
With that, I end this story with the rest of Psalm 13 I started with in my last blog:


Psalm 13: 5-6

"But I trust in your unfailing love;
my heart rejoices in your salvation

I will sing the Lord’s praise,
 for he has been good to me."

~To God be the glory